Self-Care for Exhausted Parents: Tips to Avoid Burnout and Recharge

What real self-care looks like now

Forget polished morning routines and hour-long yoga sessions. In this season of your life, real self-care looks like:

• Taking five deep breaths while rocking your baby

• Drinking water before it turns room temperature

• Changing into clean clothes, even if they’re still pajamas

• Standing in the sunlight for two minutes

These acts might seem small, but they’re stitches in the fabric of your healing.

For non-birthing parents

If you didn’t give birth (maybe you adopted, used a surrogate, or are a supportive partner), your fatigue is still real. You are also navigating sleep deprivation, emotional upheaval, and a shifting sense of self. These self-care ideas are for you too.

Start with the basics

Your body is your foundation. It deserves care, not perfection.

• Keep water within arm’s reach (by the bed, changing table, or couch)

• Stash one-handed snacks wherever you usually feed the baby

• Use dry shampoo, face wipes, and a toothbrush within reach

• Take bathroom breaks when you need them. Let the dishes wait

If you forget everything else, remember: fed, hydrated, and rested (even a little) is enough for today.

Quick guide to micro-care

Moving your body gently

This isn’t about “getting your body back.” It’s about coming back into your body.

• Rock your baby in rhythm to music you like

• Stretch your arms overhead while the bottle warms

• Do 3 slow squats while babywearing

• Take a barefoot walk in the backyard or on your porch

Movement isn’t for changing how you look. It’s for reminding you that you’re still here.

Rest like a rebel

Resting in this phase can feel like a radical act. But science backs you up:

• 10 minutes with eyes closed = mental clarity boost

• 20 minutes lying down = stress hormone reduction

If sleep won’t come:

• Try earplugs and an eye mask while baby contact naps

• Put on an audiobook with a soothing narrator

• Set a “do nothing” timer for 7 minutes (no chores allowed)

Creating micro-moments of joy

Joy doesn’t need a babysitter or a whole free hour. Look for the flickers.

• First sip of hot coffee

• Breeze on your skin as you open the window

• A lyric that makes you smile

• A friend’s meme that makes you snort-laugh

These moments are the breadcrumbs that help you find your way back.

Finding your identity again

You’re still you beneath the layers of laundry, fatigue, and baby gear. Try:

• Saying your name out loud. Not “mama” or “dada.” Your name

• Wearing one pre-parenthood item: earrings, your favorite hoodie, that ridiculous hat

• Looking at old photos of things you loved doing

• Listening to music that reminds you who you were (and still are)

You don’t need to do everything at once. One thread at a time is enough.

Connecting with your world

It’s easy to feel isolated, even surrounded by tiny hands.

• Send a voice note to a friend while folding laundry

• Join a late-night online parent group (there are others awake at 3 a.m.)

• Text someone who "gets it": “This is hard. Can I vent for a sec?”

The goal isn’t to be social; it’s to feel less alone.

Setting kind boundaries

It’s okay to say no. No to surprise visitors. No to phone calls. No to obligations that feel too heavy.

• Turn off notifications

• Post a “resting, please don’t knock” sign

• Say: “Thanks for the offer, but today’s a quiet day for us”

• Ask for help without apologizing

You don’t have to earn rest or explain your needs. You’re allowed to just have them.

Team care: don’t do this alone

Whether you’re parenting solo or with a partner, creating shared care rhythms matters.

• Trade 10-minute rescue shifts: one naps, the other watches baby

• Set up a "care code": Text “777” to someone close when you need immediate relief

• Make a list of go-to helpers: the friend who’ll hold the baby, the neighbor who’ll drop food

Even five minutes of solo time can feel like breathing again.

Mental health check-in

Sometimes “tired” is just tired. But sometimes it’s more. If the heaviness feels like:

• Dreading each day

• Feeling numb or disconnected from your baby

• Thinking “they’d be better off without me”

This isn’t just exhaustion. These can be signs of postpartum depression, anxiety, or another mood disorder, and they’re treatable.

You deserve to feel better. Talk to your doctor. Ask for a screening. Reach out.

Napper's tips: Try using this script with your provider. -"I haven’t felt like myself since the baby came. I’d like to be screened for postpartum mood disorders."

Low-key ideas for hard days

For the days you don’t feel like doing anything, try one of these:

• Scroll through photos of things you used to love doing

• Light a candle with a scent you love

• Rub lotion on your hands while waiting for the bottle to warm

• Lie on the floor and breathe deeply for one minute

• Whisper kind words to yourself, even if you don’t believe them yet

If everything feels too heavy

Take the time to:

• Call a friend.

• Message a support line.

• Ask someone to help you make a plan.

You are not weak for struggling, and you are not broken. You are human. Your feelings are real, but they are not forever.

One small step

Pick a single item from this list. Just one:

• Fill up a water bottle

• Lie down for five minutes

• Send a text that says “I’m struggling today”

• Sit in the sun for 90 seconds

These are not small acts. These are the foundations of your healing.

The care and keeping of you

This isn’t about “getting back to normal.” It’s about discovering who you are now. You are the parent who gets up night after night. Who shows up tired but full of love. Who keeps going, even when your hands shake from exhaustion.

That version of you? Deserves rest. Deserves care. Deserves to feel good again. So no, you don’t need to be perfect. You don’t need to cherish every moment. You don’t need to do more than you already are.

There is no finish line to reach, no prize for pushing through without help. There is only this moment, and the next small step forward.